Stop Job Loss from Stealing Your Confidence and Your Identity

Stop Job Loss from Stealing Your Confidence and Your IdentityStop Job Loss from Stealing Your Confidence and Your IdentityClinical psychologists and therapists provide insights on how elend to lose your identity when you lose your job.One big challenge a professional faces when hes lost his job is that hes also lost a big piece of his identity.Being out of work is a terrible feeling, said Elizabeth Friedman, PhD, a clinical psychologist in New York. We identify at least part of our self with what we do. Hopefully its not all of our self-definition, but it is a big part of it. So we lose our grounding, our footing, in certain ways. Who am I? Where am I going? What do I do tomorrow morning at 800? Do I get up? Do I stay in bed? Staying in bed is not the right answer, experts agree. In fact, sticking to a praxis and applying control when and where you can is key.Take one day to feel terrible, and then get moving, Friedman said. Its very important to keep basic routines. You cant suddenl y be up all night long watching Law and Order. Get up in the morning take a shower. If youre a guy, shave if youre a woman, do your hair. Send out a million e-mails, contact all of your friends.A sense of identity loss can affect a persons relationships and family dynamics, as well.When youve lost a job, you start to question your own identity, said Kevin Skinner, who has a Ph.D. in marriage and family therapy and shares expert advice at MyExpertSolution.com. Sometimes if its an extended job loss, you begin to feel guilty, especially if its affecting your family, and maybe your wife has to go back to work. You start to feel like, Whats wrong with me? And its not about that.What it is about, said Skinner, is reaching out to others and focusing on realistic solutions.The best thing we can do in these times is get additional support, he said. You might have to turn to family for support. You might have to go live somewhere else - downgrade your home, downgrade your cars. The resilient people are going to say, Im going to find a solution - Im a person who finds solutions to problems.